Pre-nups a/k/a Pre-Marriage Plans: Your questions answered

How does a prenuptial agreement affect a relationship?

How your future spouse negotiates a prenuptial agreement will tell you a lot about how s/he will negotiate all the other (millions of) issues you will have to negotiate during your marriage.  Sadly, some people view the term “pre-nup” as a negative.  It would be better if we called these agreements Pre-Marriage Plans. It’s easy to see why it can be foolish to enter into something as big as marriage – which affects us physically, financially, socially, and psychologically – without a plan.  One BIG problem with pre-nups is that they are written by lawyers.  Beyond their own marriages, most lawyers know little about the workings of a successful marriage.  And, typically, pre-nups are written as pre-divorce agreements. While it is important to have an exit strategy when you are entering into something as all encompassing as a marriage, the exit strategy is just a small part of what the Pre-Marriage Plan should include.  Without a viable Pre-Marriage Plan many couples go into marriage (still in the honeymoon/hormone wash stage) only to wake up one day and find themselves ill equipped to negotiate their futures.  

Does a prenuptial really prevent divorce problems? Do people still go to court and fight?

Sometimes a pre-nup can prevent a divorce battle.  (If it was clearly written and everyone still agrees to follow it.)  Sometimes the pre-nup creates yet another layer of divorce issues.  If there are ambiguities people will first fight to validate/invalidate the pre-nup.  If the pre-nup is not valid (which can happen for a variety of reasons) now the real fight begins, but the parties have already bloodied themselves in the pre-nup battle.  

Can you win if you signed a prenup? If so, under what conditions?

What does win mean?  If you mean can you get the pre-nup invalidated the answer is sometimes.  A lawyer should answer the question as to what conditions in your state will invalidate a pre-nup.  In many states fraud or duress can invalidate a pre-nup and proving/dis-proving fraud or duress is where the battle happens.