Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes, Divorce, TMZ

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are in the news.  Its going to be their call.  Divorce is difficult enough. Do they make it more difficult than it has to be?  Lets hope they are able to send a positive example and move through their divorce with grace and dignity.  Lets hope they do not allow the lawyers to manipulate them while they are at this emotional low.  Lets hope they remember that this is a family problem, not a legal circus.  And, lets hope they can remain united because their connection (through Suri) is going to remain for the rest of their lives.  Eventually, they will be Grandma and Grandpa to the same babies and those children will find reports in newspaper archives of their divorce.  What do they want those future grandchildren to see?

http://www.tmz.com/2012/07/05/tom-cruise-katie-holmes-divorce-not-over-scientology/  TMZ wants to know what the divorce is about.  I can tell you what the divorce is about.  Every divorce is about the same thing – s/he did not value (and connect to) me the way I wanted or needed.  So, if Katie perceived that Tom valued Scientology more than he valued her, Scientology becomes the divorce focus.  But, the underlying issue – feeling devalued and disconnected – is the same in 98% of the cases.  The events and examples (what the spouse did or did not do) are just the triggers.  The bullet in divorce is feeling devalued and disconnected.